kan free free kena panggil betina bodoh.

kimakkkkkkkkkkk sialllllll aku nda pernah bagi baca text/whatsapp kalau gaduh. okay, cukupla. every last bit harapan yang aku ada. hancur

flee now or left behind?

im afraid of myself. its not you its me. leave now when you still have the chance. i am a pessimist. an avid pessimist. that one thing you can't change about me. i will only can make you broken. and i don't know how to fix em. afraid of myself. am afraid of myself.

hope, for hope there's life

i really wanna let you read what i blogged right now. hmm, i hope one day you'd stumbled upon this entry. specifically this day entry only. no less.

for this once,

can i just concentrate on my paper tomorrow? everything is so fucked up that i wanna shut the world down tonight. but i cant, thinking of my exam tomorrow.

IN THE END,

i couldn't care less.

promise is promise.

once there is a boy who promised a girl that he always be there for her. through thick and thin. stay with her. always be there to cheer her up on her 'mood swing' day. to keep on whispering positive thought in her when the negative part in her brain is activated. well, to cut stories short, promises is meant to be broken. one day, the girl break down and started to be engulfed with negative thought. the girl started to talk nonsense. things she never meant at all. (well as she tell me, there is a little truth on what she says to boy but whatever,) the girl told me maybe at that time, the boy is too tired of the girl. too tired. annoyed maybe. then that's the end of their stories. sad, but it was true story. 

p/s: the boy had promised her! but i guess it is true, very true indeed. a promise is meant to be broken. 

Like A Knife

I dream a lot, I know you say
I've got to get away.
"The world is not yours for the taking"
Is all you ever say.
I know I'm not the best for you,
But promise that you'll stay.
Cause if I watch you go,
You'll see me wasting, you'll see me wasting away

Cause today, you walked out of my life
Cause today, your words felt like a knife
I'm not living this life.

Goodbyes are meant for lonely people standing in the rain
And no matter where I go it's always pouring all the same.
These streets are filled with memories
Both perfect and in pain
And all I wanna do is love you
But I'm the only one to blame.
Cause today, you walked out of my life
Cause today, your words felt like a knife
I'm not living this life.

But what do I know, if you're leaving
All you did was stop the bleeding.
But these scars will stay forever,
These scars will stay forever
And these words they have no meaning
If we cannot find the feeling
That we held on to together
Try your hardest to remember

Stay with me,
Or watch me bleed,
I need you just to breathe.

Cause today, you walked out of my life
Stay with me, or watch me bleed
Cause today, your words felt like a knife
I need you just to breathe.
I'm not living this life

and i began to understand,

leaves are falling,
water evaporates to thin air,
playground abandon, 
seasons changed, 
everything changed.

those little eyes has become all grown up,
those little feet that once running carefree; as if the world is their playground,
is now safely tucked in their big black shiny leather shoes,
in their 6 inch heels,
waiting in the streetwalk,
waiting for a miracle to happen.

fear is what we should feel, 
cause the world is cruel,
for the world is full of fool,
who cannot even distinguished right and wrong.